It kind of amazes me how I started writing. It has taken me a while to even admit that I am writer (out loud). It sounded so foreign to me yet now it is the exact opposite. I am about to write something that for some may come across the wrong way. I need everyone to understand that I truly love my daughter and I would give anything to have her back. She was my pride and joy and that will never change. However, God didn’t plan for her to stay on this earth longer than her eight and half years … [Read more...]
What do we have to be thankful for?
I know that this question is not normally asked at this time year. We always attribute it to Thanksgiving Day. But shouldn’t we always be asking ourselves this? For some it is really easy to answer. To those looking from the outside it looks like they have truly had a blessed life. A life filled with hope and happiness and no terrible tragedy to speak of. People who have died have done so because they have gotten older. But for so many this is not the case. I look at the tornadoes that … [Read more...]
Giving your life over
(I wrote this last Sunday, March 4, 2012 during worship service) I sat here during church service and watched a man become baptized. This is such a special time. The commitment is huge and precious for any person who does it. He walked down into the water. Our pastor briefly told us how that our church had sent over Bibles while the soldiers were deployed to Afghanistan. This man had received one of those very precious Bibles. He started to read it. As a result he decided to give his life to … [Read more...]
The innocence of a child
It's interesting with kids the things they will say and are not scared or embarrassed by. They don't have any reason to think before speaking yet because they are still so naive to what the world holds for them. It is hard lessons over time in our lives that start to teach us to become more and more reserved. Some to the point of holding everything in and not sharing with anyone unless that person comes to truly trust someone else. I think that kids can see things as they are and are still … [Read more...]
Today kind of sucked for me
Today kind of sucks for me. I had to go to the hospital to have a procedure done. Don’t freak out. It is nothing serious. My GI doctor wanted me to have the test (procedure) done to check to see how much acid I have that might be coming up from my stomach. There were two test to be done. The first one took about an hour to do. I had the privilege of have a tube (she said it was a pediatric one at that) stuck through my nose that she then had to slide down into my belly. Well, through this … [Read more...]
A Mother’s Love
A mother's love is a very beautiful emotion and something so incredibly special. I was just thinking last night how every person in the world living and breathing today has a mother and father somewhere whether they are alive or dead. However, not everyone has a child or ever will. It is a very special bond between parent and child. It is different for a mother with her children and a father with his children. God intended it this way for a reason. I know when it comes to our daughter that … [Read more...]
Life’s Moments…
I am here at work today just having a normal day. I had a book by Angie Smith called I Will Carry You that I let someone borrow. It is such a story of encouragement to me while at the same time it made me ball like a baby. I could so relate to her story. It truly touched my life. I am ever grateful to have been introduced to this story at my women’s retreat this past March. I let a coworker borrow the book to read. For her it was just too sad and so she had laid it on my desk this … [Read more...]
Just sitting here thinking…
I was sitting here thinking on my way home from work today how I don’t write as I used to. Here recently it has all been about either writing Mari’s book or now attempting my first hand at writing something fiction. However, I have been really thinking about Mari here recently as her three year mark approaches. It is hard to believe that it has been almost three years. It still doesn’t seem possible. Mari will always continue to live on in my heart. I hope through her story she will also … [Read more...]
Women’s Retreat second entry
I sit here really missing Mari tonight. I brought with me to the women’s retreat her photo album of her last day, I just sat here going through it. I was not really sure if I should bring it or not but was glad I did. Reading that story tonight about that woman who lost her baby brought up all the memories of her last day. I sat here crying as I went through it. I miss her so much and love her so much. I look at those pictures and it brings me right back to that very day. It is still … [Read more...]
The Waiting Game
I sit here at work on my lunch thinking about my upcoming afternoon. I am anxious because of what I must do. I have an appointment at 3pm with a security investigator to get my security clearance. I have to get this for the tentative job I was offered as a government service worker on Fort Knox as a GS-5. I am excited about the new job because I will get to be an administrative assistant again and I will get to quit Wal-Mart. I have been a department manager at Wal-Mart for the past 6 … [Read more...]
