I went and visited a website of someone I knew in our grief group back in Chicago today. The reason I visited it was because on the old blogger site I had started this one on (which is technically still up and running, don’t ask me why, it does redirect people to here however :) ) I have this woman’s website listed under Blogs of Importance. Under the listing, it shows a title of the most recent blog post. This one was labeled, “Letting go.” I thought that meant she was letting go of her … [Read more...]
Joy
Joy can mean so much to so many different people. For me I felt pure joy last night. I spent the day determined to write write write in the fictional book I am writing. I actually wrote 8,472 words and finished the first draft of my novel. Talk about exciting. I think back to how I began writing. It was to keep my friends and family abreast of what was happening to my little baby girl. I started a Care Page. Those first fifteen days of writing were while she was a live and the last day, the … [Read more...]
Remember back…
(This was written last Sunday, March 4, 2012) You just never know when it might hit you again. Today in my Sunday school class we had walked in about 15 minutes late. Our Sunday school teacher was in the middle of telling something. He was talking about how this young kid (probably late teens to early twenty’s) who sounded like he has been making a lot of bad choices. They went into Wal-mart and he stayed in the car. When they came back out he was unresponsive. By the time they got him … [Read more...]
Today kind of sucked for me
Today kind of sucks for me. I had to go to the hospital to have a procedure done. Don’t freak out. It is nothing serious. My GI doctor wanted me to have the test (procedure) done to check to see how much acid I have that might be coming up from my stomach. There were two test to be done. The first one took about an hour to do. I had the privilege of have a tube (she said it was a pediatric one at that) stuck through my nose that she then had to slide down into my belly. Well, through this … [Read more...]
Mari’s Special Video
YEAH!!! I finally figured out how to get Mari's special video that was played at her funeral uploaded onto YouTube. I had it on Google Video for quite sometime but then that went away when Google and YouTube merged together. When I then tried to upload it into YouTube it said it was too long because it was over 15 minutes long. I didn't know there was a specific time amount or if I could do anything about it until I went on a hunting expedition on YouTube this evening. I finally found out that … [Read more...]
Things that happen
Today kind of sucks for me. I had to go to the hospital to have a procedure done. Don’t freak out. It is nothing serious. My GI doctor wanted me to have this test (procedure) done to check to see how much acid I have that might be coming up from my stomach and causing me problems. There were two test to be done. The first one took about an hour to perform. I had the privilege of having a tube (she said it was a pediatric one at that) stuck through my nose that she then had to slide down into … [Read more...]
Life’s Moments…
I am here at work today just having a normal day. I had a book by Angie Smith called I Will Carry You that I let someone borrow. It is such a story of encouragement to me while at the same time it made me ball like a baby. I could so relate to her story. It truly touched my life. I am ever grateful to have been introduced to this story at my women’s retreat this past March. I let a coworker borrow the book to read. For her it was just too sad and so she had laid it on my desk this … [Read more...]
The Tears of Mother’s Day
I sit here in my comfy cozy recliner at about 1am. I sit here thinking about Mari and knowing that when I wake up in the morning it is Mother’s Day. I have dreaded it all week. All it does for me know is remind me that I am a mom without her child on this earth any longer. I feel childless. I dread going to church tomorrow morning because all they will do there is wish all the mother’s a Happy Mother’s Day. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I think it is an important day. However, it will … [Read more...]
Women’s Retreat second entry
I sit here really missing Mari tonight. I brought with me to the women’s retreat her photo album of her last day, I just sat here going through it. I was not really sure if I should bring it or not but was glad I did. Reading that story tonight about that woman who lost her baby brought up all the memories of her last day. I sat here crying as I went through it. I miss her so much and love her so much. I look at those pictures and it brings me right back to that very day. It is still … [Read more...]
Women’s Retreat first entry
Keith and I have been attending our new church. We have really been enjoying it. The church has a women’s retreat that happens to be this very weekend. We left this morning around 9:30am and finally arrived in Tennessee around 5:45pm. I drove one of the other women’s Suburban. Man, that was truly a long drive and my derrière was so incredibly happy once we finally got here (I think it may have even been secretly dancing). I went upstairs and found my room. This cabin is really nice … [Read more...]
