Yesterday while at church, a lady from my Sunday School class announced something very special. She said she was going to hosting a Tastefully Simple (or is Simply Tasteful) party or something like that. I know that she plans on selling the goodies to members at our church. Then she announced that all proceeds would be going towards costs to get Mari’s book edited. To say I was shocked doesn’t even quite describe it. I am ever so grateful she came up with this idea and others are willing … [Read more...]
I’m still amazed…
I am still amazed sometimes when someone tells me they think I am a good writer. I have never thought of myself in this light. To be honest, the only time I have written anything before in the past were for 2 reasons and 2 reasons only: an assignment/paper for school/college or writing in my diary. That was it. I never wrote stories or anything. Then Mari gets sick and I write out for all of our friends and family updates on her progress. Then she dies. I purchase a special journal to … [Read more...]
Going on Business
Keith leaves on another business trip tomorrow. He will be back on Friday. It’s not too bad. He will leave again a week after he gets back on another one for another week. He seems to usually go for about 2 weeks every month to different places all over the country. I think he likes the scenery but is getting tired of the traveling. It’s hard to believe he turned 40 today. For almost half of our lives we have been together. When you really start to think about it that is a very long … [Read more...]
Grateful for the little things in life
It seems that sitting in church, like I am now, seems to be a place where I feel I can open up so freely and easily. I am so grateful and excited to be going back to church and finding one that Keith and I feel at home with. I know that it is God who has been nudging our hearts to find a new church home. It just has been hard grieving as much as we have and having anger issues. But it feels good to be around fellow believers as we are now. I think now I am going to seek out another woman … [Read more...]
Seeing Mari again
I want to share a passage of the Bible that was recently shown to me: 2 Samuel 12:15-23 15 After Nathan had gone home, the LORD struck the child that Uriah’s wife had borne to David, and he became ill. 16 David pleaded with God for the child. He fasted and spent the nights lying in sackcloth[a] on the ground. 17 The elders of his household stood beside him to get him up from the ground, but he refused, and he would not eat any food with them. 18 On the seventh day the child died. … [Read more...]
Singing…
January 2 I sit here in church service. Right away they start by singing. The tears start to well up and I have to leave. I still have a hard time just being able to sing in church. It is so hard for me. Somehow it just makes me miss Mari all the more. She would always love the singing portion of church service. She would sing in her own special way. She would sometimes flap her arms in excitement. She truly loved the singing. I think I just truly miss that with her not here … [Read more...]
Missing the imporant moments
December 13, 2010 I am driving in my car this morning and the roads are kind of nasty from the snow we got yesterday. I finally plug in my iPhone so I can listen to my iPod. Last night on the way home from work I decided to play Steven Curtis Chapman’s CD “Beauty Will Rise.” This CD was written and created after the tragic death of his youngest daughter Maria. Maria passed away on May 21, 2008, only a little less than 2 months before Mari did. His CD is one of the ways he dealt with … [Read more...]
The struggles of life…
The struggles of life, there always seem to be a never ending supply of them. Some of them seem simple and easy to overcome. Some seem out of the ordinary but we learn to deal with them anyway. Then some are simply unbearable and hard to imagine what the light at the end of the tunnel even looks like. That last one is the one that can describe, or at least try to, as to what it’s like for a parent to have lost a child. When it happens, the second it happens, there is no light. It feels … [Read more...]
Driving…
I sit here in our car driving. Today is December 29th. For most people it is just an average day. For some it even brings the special privilege of being their birthday. This day has always brought about special memories for us. However now it just brings sadness and tears to my eyes. Today Mari would have turned 11. I was getting so frustrated with drivers and yelling at them over stupid stuff. Then the tears just started to come down. I had to pull over with the ache that is there in … [Read more...]
Julie and Sylvia
Sylvia, I want you to know how much of a dear friend you have become to me. I mean, don't get me wrong, you were such a help to Keith and I when we were still living in DeKalb. Every Sunday morning you enabled us to be able to attend church service while you were taking care of our beloved angel during children’s church. You enabled her to participate and be around other kids her own age. You have such a gift and you were a God send as you have the speech background that could ultimately … [Read more...]
