I think back to 15 years ago today and my world was about to permanently change. Right now it’s 10:15 a.m., Alaskan time, but in the Chicago area it’s one fifteen in the afternoon. At this point, the doctor had started the Pitocin and I was about three hours into delivering Mariana. I was a little less than six hours away from giving birth to her. She took us from being a two to a three. Our little miracle was coming into the world. Little did we know that only eight-and-a-half short years later … [Read more...]
Birthdays
Birthdays. When we are young, a child, we can’t wait until that next birthday comes. The day after we have one we start counting down the days until our next one, just like Christmas. However, when we get older, typically after 21, birthdays just become another day where we turn older. They don’t mean as much. Well, two days ago it was my birthday. It was one of those significant ones. I turned 40. I was holding onto my thirty’s as long as I could. In fact, here is a little funny story. … [Read more...]
Keith’s 40th
Today is Keith’s 40th birthday. He starts a new generation today. The last generation has had some of the biggest bumps and bruises he’s had in his life. Those bumps and bruises have slowly been healing but they will never go away. We both continue to live our lives on a path neither one could have expected or wanted yet here we both are anyway. I like to tell people, “It is what it is.” What I mean by this is can I do anything about the path that has been laid before me? No I can’t. … [Read more...]
Justin Bieber
December 22 Today ended up starting as a good day. I felt good about it. I went to work like I normally do. I was putting away my freight and I had these Justin Bieber backpacks I was putting out. As I am putting them out I start to think of my dearest friend Shelly’s daughter Lexi. Shelly tells me how much Lexi loves Justin Bieber. Then I got to thinking about how Mari would be the same age as Lexi. Not that Mari would have ever gotten into Just Bieber or anything. It’s just the … [Read more...]
Driving…
I sit here in our car driving. Today is December 29th. For most people it is just an average day. For some it even brings the special privilege of being their birthday. This day has always brought about special memories for us. However now it just brings sadness and tears to my eyes. Today Mari would have turned 11. I was getting so frustrated with drivers and yelling at them over stupid stuff. Then the tears just started to come down. I had to pull over with the ache that is there in … [Read more...]
6 months have come and gone
It is hard to believe that as I sit here typing this that 6 months have gone by since Mariana passed away. Sometimes I just sit here and wonder how this could be. I mean a year ago at this time we had just moved into our new home. Keith had finally gotten his orders for the Oak Lawn recruiting station to become a station commander there. We were getting ready to have both Keith's and Mari's 8th birthday party together here in the next couple of weeks. She was in her new school and she was … [Read more...]