Recently things have been good. I have not been overly sad. I mean, I miss Mari but I am doing good. I sit here in church again. I am glad we have started going to church on a regular basis. It is important for the two of us and our marriage. My hope is it only makes us stronger and helps us to get through the loss of Mari. I know through God anything can happen. I know some people might say, “How could you believe in a God who would do this?” My response is God knows more than I … [Read more...]
Missing her…
December 6, 2010 Missing Mari, what does that really mean anyway? It means you think about her. For me it means all the time. I don’t know if I’ve had a day without thinking about her at least once. Of course as we get closer to her 11th birthday, it seems more and more often. Thinking about her leads to missing her. Missing her leads to the ache I feel in my heart. In the end, this leads to wishing she was here. Everyone says she is in a better place. Even Keith thinks this as … [Read more...]
Work at Walmart
(It looks like this was written around end of October) I have been working at Walmart now for the past 2 months. When asked, “Is it what you expected?” I’m not sure if I know what to expect exactly. I mean, I know I would be on my feet the majority of the time (I mean it is Walmart after all). But as for what I expected, I really did not have a lot of expectations. I know that starting off on the graveyard shift would be a drastic change since I have never worked that shift before. Not … [Read more...]
Unchoices
When life gets hard, what should you do? Everyone is different and everyone handles their problems in different ways. For the most part, our lives involve different paths and the choices we make to get there. Some choices come by easily and others are difficult to almost impossible to have to make. And then there are the things that happen in our lives that can be called the unchoices. So what exactly is an unchoice you might be asking? Well, this is when something either happens to you … [Read more...]
How quickly time flies before we realize…
As most of you know, and those of you who are new and don't, I have moving my website to a new server and creating a new site for better utilization and personalization. In doing this, I have been going through each and every post I have ever posted and reorganizing everything. I am better organizing categories to help people find a post they might be interested in. I have now included tags for every post. So far I am to the end of the year 2008. I still have all of 2009 and what has been … [Read more...]
It Happens At the Strangest Time
I am sure you all can imagine that Mari is never really far from my mind. Today is no different. Most of you know by now that I have started working out again. I set my alarm for 5am this morning (yeah, that is the correct time) so I could be to the gym by 6:30am for my very first personal training session. My personal trainer is Jennifer. Man she kicked my booty this morning. So much so that she cut our session 7 minutes early as my body was completely worn out (man am I out of … [Read more...]
Then it hits ya
Since moving to Kentucky, I fell in love with a program on the Style Channel. The program is called Clean House. If you've never seen it before, they take people who are clutter fanatics (and man there are some that are so nasty) and help them clean out the clutter, sell the stuff in a yard sale, and then give them a makeover in the rooms they cleared out. Well, they have a couple of shows that came from the original called Clean House: Search for the Messiest House in the Country and Clean … [Read more...]
To Lose Weight or Not To Lose Weight: That is the Question
I am very disappointed in myself. When I weighed myself this evening I weighed 1XX (did you honestly think I 'd say how much I weigh, yeah right. LOL). I'm so disappointed in myself and how I've slowly been gaining weight. In the last year I have put on another ten pounds. That's a lot of gosh darn weight. If I keep at it I will be over 200 pounds in the next few years. The one good thing I have going for me is I am 5’7” tall. When people look at me they notice I have thin arms and … [Read more...]
Strength…
Strength: Where does it come from? Everyone always wants to tell me how strong I am for how I am today with dealing with the death of Mari. And I used to think the same thing when I saw a parent and how they were dealing with the death of a child. I would think to myself how incredibly strong that person must be to be dealing with the loss. The strength they have inside themselves must be so incredibly strong to be able to get through this incredibly hard time. I know I could never be that … [Read more...]
It’s time to get in shape
Well, it's been awhile but a long time coming: I have officially starting working out again (of course it's only the first day, but you have to keep optimistic right). I signed up for personal training this week on post. I went in this morning to have my very first session (or should I say second as the first time I met with my personal trainer she went over some guidelines and what not to get me started right). When I arrived I found out that she, I believe, fell down some stairs and could … [Read more...]
