Some of you know we have a "Polls" page. For those of you who don't, I have simply created a couple of polls to help us with our site. If you have the time, please fill out both that are located on the page. I do go in and check everyday to see what people have said thus far. As of yet, I have had only one person fill out one of the polls and no one fill out the other. I am asking, if you have the time, to please fill them out. They will probably only take a minute or two your time. I want to … [Read more...]
Love The One Your With
Well, I sit here at home today by myself as Keith has left on his first trip for his new position today. He'll only be gone until Thursday, in other words five days and four nights. When you put it into overall perspective, it's really not that long considering he is in the Army and he could be being deployed instead and gone for a year or two. But still, I hate it when he has to leave. I'm not one of those wives who actually looks forward to their husbands leaving for a few days or if he … [Read more...]
To Feel Lucky…
What happens after sixteen years of marriage? Is it still wedded bliss or is it a nightmare you can't wait to get out of? Well if you're lucky, it'll be as close to wedded bliss as the two of you can be. What I mean by wedded bliss is not that when you first start going out and everything feels so fresh and new and you just feel so owey goowey with each other or even that first year of marriage where you can tell the couple is newlyweds. I'm talking about how after sixteen years of marriage … [Read more...]
That Hideous Doctrine by John Thomas
I wanted to share this with everyone. It was given to me while my husband and I were taking Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University at our church over two years ago. I just recently found my copy of it and wanted to share it with all of you. From Moody Monthly/September 1985 That hideous doctrine of hell is fading. How often have you thought of it in the past month, for instance? Does it make a difference in your concern for others, in your witness? Is it a constant and proper … [Read more...]
Contemplating Christmas
T'is the season of joy, happiness & love, or at least that is how it used to be. Last year, what would've been our first Christmas without Mari, we got to escape and go to Hawaii. I didn't have to deal with the glaring reality of her not being here. Now this year has come. It's technically our second Christmas season. But the reality is so different. This is like it's our first one without her instead. It feels like ever since Thanksgiving Day I've been just getting by. Almost like … [Read more...]
The One
I sit here thinking of the one not here, the one not far from my mind but ever-present. The one has a mind like no one can fathom, a mind all one's own with no care in the world. The mind can do wondrous things, to help us to cope or simply get by. However, the mind of the one is all unique and blessed, the one knows no wrong or gets scared of the rest. The one's fears are only in the head of the one's dreams, for this person may have seemed to be unreal to those … [Read more...]
Approaching 11 months…
We are now approaching eleven months that Mari's been gone. June 16 will be exactly eleven months. Whether we want it to or not, time just continues to carry on. I was going through this site a little while ago and realized that I'd not posted anything new since Mother's day. It's been hard this last month and I know as the day approaches the one year mark it'll continue to get harder. Then I was reading the comment that someone wrote anonymously. What the person said was basically that I … [Read more...]
Missing her…
I miss Mari so much today. I'm not even sure why. I talked with an old family friend I've known since I was probably about four or five years old today. She lost a son a couple of years ago so she knows what it's like to lose a child. She's a good person to talk to. For some reason I keep thinking back to the Saturday, the day after her cerebral hemorrhage and cardiac arrest, and when the PICU attending told us it was the worst CT scan she'd ever seen. How that day it felt like my world … [Read more...]
Life In General…
I was just sitting here thinking tonight about life in general. The last 8 months have been more than I ever thought possible. Two days before Mari had gotten sick, my mom’s brother, my Uncle Ray died in his sleep. I believe he was only 62 or 63 years old. I remember growing up and spending the night at his house on Christmas Eve with our ENTIRE BIG family. I think he may have even played Santa a few times. That was our first huge blow for the year. Then Mari got sick. We all know how that … [Read more...]
