It’s that time of year again. That time of year everyone dreads yet some look forward to. What time of year is it you may ask? Well it is TAX TIME.

For most people this is just a time of year that is required by our federal government to report how much money we have made during the year and to try to find as many deductions as the IRS will allow to either pay the least amount of money possible, or, for those that are lucky, a refund.

Every year I would start getting all my documents together in January so that by the time February 1 came along I could immediately start working on them to get our refund back as quickly as possible. I used to love doing our taxes. I used to love the fact we would get a nice refund back every year. It was like a little savings account set aside for us.

However, this no longer applies for me. Last year will probably have been the most difficult of all. Last year when we filed our return I had to tell the IRS that Mari had passed away. Do you know how difficult that was to say that your one and only child is now gone. You actually have to report to the IRS the day she passed away. If you think about it, nothing is truly sacred to the government. But in a way, it was like it truly became official. Last year I waited until almost the last possible second to file. I simply didn’t want to do it at all.

This year is a little better. I’m still not looking forward to doing it. When you go to fill out your forms, she’s no longer sitting as a dependent. It’s just Keith and I. It’s put in black and white to show that she is no longer a part of our family, as far as the IRS is concerned. Sometimes it just makes it all too real.

Last year we almost had to pay instead of receiving a refund. We have not had to do that in years. Since the year Mari was born. Sometimes reality is just ugly. But we keep moving forward. I am sure that as time continues to move forward it’ll get easier and easier with each passing year. But for now, I simply don’t look forward to it. (Beside, who in their right mind truly LOVES doing their taxes.)