When someone close to you dies it leaves a hole in your heart. What I tell people is that a hole was left by our daughter. As the years go by it will get smaller and smaller but it will never completely be filled again until we are in heaven seeing each other again someday. For me, I do not look at the hole as something God is supposed to fill. I think we all have little holes for different tragedies, no matter how big or small, that have happened in our lives. If the hole was to be filled by … [Read more...]
Just sitting here thinking…
I was sitting here thinking on my way home from work today how I don’t write as I used to. Here recently it has all been about either writing Mari’s book or now attempting my first hand at writing something fiction. However, I have been really thinking about Mari here recently as her three year mark approaches. It is hard to believe that it has been almost three years. It still doesn’t seem possible. Mari will always continue to live on in my heart. I hope through her story she will also … [Read more...]
I am needing help…
I am needing some help with the title for Mari’s book. Just using her eyes, I would like to come up with something short and to the point. If you have a suggestions, please click "other" and provide it in the blank space. Thank you. To give a brief synopsis of the book, it is about her life the first part, then what happened to her in the hospital, the grief journey I have gone through since her death, a dedications chapter and a fictional story at the end of the book that helps to think of … [Read more...]
Women’s Retreat third entry
The start of a new day. It is a beautiful day but to look outside you wouldn’t know it. Our cabin is off the mountain side and you can see all the other beautiful log cabins around us USUALLY. This morning looking outside our bedroom window everything is in a major fog. It is interesting how it can just come and envelope the area like this. Fog is kind of representative of our own lives. Everything can be beautiful and then all of a sudden something happens in your life and the fog can … [Read more...]
I’m still amazed…
I am still amazed sometimes when someone tells me they think I am a good writer. I have never thought of myself in this light. To be honest, the only time I have written anything before in the past were for 2 reasons and 2 reasons only: an assignment/paper for school/college or writing in my diary. That was it. I never wrote stories or anything. Then Mari gets sick and I write out for all of our friends and family updates on her progress. Then she dies. I purchase a special journal to … [Read more...]
Not again…
Well, today started off as a decent day. I had to be to work at 7am (no fun by the way). Outside was cold but I didn’t realize just how cold. Even when I started my car to warm it up I still didn’t know. It wasn’t until I got back in my car and heading to work that the temperature gauge in my car showing how cold it was outside at a balmy 3 degrees Fahrenheit outside. When I get to work I park my car on the GM side of Walmart but the doors there were not open yet. So I had to walk to the … [Read more...]
Super Bowl Sunday
I sit here watching the Super Bowl where the Steelers and Packers are playing each other. Keith and I are at a friend’s house just enjoying each other’s company. It’s nice instead of just being at home. I sit here thinking about how this little pink journal I bring with me almost everywhere has become quite a companion for me. I am able to write down my thoughts that might otherwise be lost forever. It’s nice to know I have this. Some people think this is my personal diary. I tell … [Read more...]
Rules aren’t meant to be followed right?!?!
I just love it when people completely disregard the rules. NOT! Keith and I live here in Kentucky. He is stationed at Fort Knox. It is pretty chilly outside right now with our highs around 20 to 30 degrees and the wind chills even colder. You’ve got to love it when things are below freezing (not really lol). Well, most of you know I work at Walmart by now. Many of you may not know, however, that I have pretty bad asthma and unfortunately for me, my lungs happen to be super sensitive … [Read more...]
Find a new church home
Well, yesterday was a good day. I had the day off so I spent most of the day typing the entries I write in my pink journal here at work. It felt good to finally get them typed up and posted on Mari’s website. Now that her b-day has come and gone, it is easier again. I am grateful for this. We went to try out a new church on Sunday. We have not gone to church since we moved here at the end of April last year. I know I started to feel a tug to start looking in the past couple of months … [Read more...]
Justin Bieber
December 22 Today ended up starting as a good day. I felt good about it. I went to work like I normally do. I was putting away my freight and I had these Justin Bieber backpacks I was putting out. As I am putting them out I start to think of my dearest friend Shelly’s daughter Lexi. Shelly tells me how much Lexi loves Justin Bieber. Then I got to thinking about how Mari would be the same age as Lexi. Not that Mari would have ever gotten into Just Bieber or anything. It’s just the … [Read more...]
