I think there is an old saying that when something happens to others we always say something like, “I’m so sorry it happened to them but thank goodness it didn't happen to me. We’re human and selfish by nature. I think it is natural that we think this way because no one in their right mind would actually say, “Oh I wish it had been me,” when something terrible happens. I know every one of those parents from yesterday who were able to bring their little ones home were so thankful their kids … [Read more...]
Sitting here thinking
I sit here staring at my precious baby girl’s slide show on this very site. There are so many of her from all different ages. From when she had longer hair to when we finally cut it short so she’d quite using her hair as a chewing device. The little smile that stares back at you cuts right into my soul. It is something I miss all the time. I haven’t just looked at the pictures in a while and tonight I posted something on the site and then sat there staring at the slide show remember all the … [Read more...]
The “Softening”
In a month, Mari will have been gone for four years. I have talked several times over the last four years in how the day she died is not an anniversary as this signifies happiness to me. My eighteen year wedding anniversary was this past February. That is a happy time. Mari’s death, anything but. However, I have come to call it the mark. When Mari died I became wrapped up in the utter sorrow and sadness of it all. My heart felt like it had been ripped open and a gaping would left in its … [Read more...]
Hitting “The Mark”
I went and visited a website of someone I knew in our grief group back in Chicago today. The reason I visited it was because on the old blogger site I had started this one on (which is technically still up and running, don’t ask me why, it does redirect people to here however :) ) I have this woman’s website listed under Blogs of Importance. Under the listing, it shows a title of the most recent blog post. This one was labeled, “Letting go.” I thought that meant she was letting go of her … [Read more...]
Writing Fiction
I’ve been writing my first fictional book ever. It has been quite the experience. I will tell you writing fiction is so different than writing a college paper. A year ago when I started this journey, let’s just say, I was a little green behind the ears. I was so naïve to the proper rules and etiquette of fiction. Like the dreaded passive verbs (was/were/had) and ‘ly’ words. These are a big no-no in fiction (who would a thunk). I can remember growing up reading romance novels (starting … [Read more...]
Becoming a Writer
What has writing done for me? Well more than I ever thought even possible. I remember sitting in my high school English class and being just a “C” student. It was hard for me. To get into college I couldn’t even test into English 101. I would have had to go three below and start with English 097. I mean, you really can’t much lower. So for years I have always thought of myself as a terrible writer and that my English writing sucked. By the time I was around 22 or 23 years old I was … [Read more...]
A Mother’s Love
A mother's love is a very beautiful emotion and something so incredibly special. I was just thinking last night how every person in the world living and breathing today has a mother and father somewhere whether they are alive or dead. However, not everyone has a child or ever will. It is a very special bond between parent and child. It is different for a mother with her children and a father with his children. God intended it this way for a reason. I know when it comes to our daughter that … [Read more...]
Reflecting…
In my last post I wrote about how I joined this new group for writers. I have been receiving welcome's from the different members. And in my long winded sort of way (I just can't seem to keep my words down to a simple few sentences LOL), I responded back to what they have said. As I wrote a reply back yesterday I was thinking that it might be a good message to put on here. So I decided to put up a couple of them on here for what I said to share with all of you. I will post them over the next … [Read more...]
Life’s moments and other things…
It seems that I don’t write like I used to. I can honestly say that I am really starting to miss it. The kids have been with us for almost 7 months now and we are finally into a good routine. There are some thing we are still working the kinks out with but for the most part it is really going good. So much so I have started thinking about getting back to the book. I hate the fact I had to put it on hold but I guess life has its own agenda and it did not include what I wanted (darn it … [Read more...]
Changes in life…
First let me start off by saying long time no talk. I am sorry I have been gone for a while. A lot has happened in my life since the last time I posted anything on Mari’s website. I look back at the date of June 23 and it seems like a lifetime ago. On July 15 Keith and I headed to Chicago to be with Mari (so to speak) on her 3 year mark of being gone. July 16 was officially 3 years and we spent some time at her grave. It is hard to believe that 3 years have already come and gone but they … [Read more...]
