Grief and bereavement is a long and difficult journey. Even if the loss is imminent and you think you are prepared, there is no adequate preparation in the end. The agony of losing a loved one, particularly a beloved child who should have long outlived you, is acute and sudden yet also seemingly never-ending. When I lost my niece a few years ago the intensity of the grief I felt overwhelmed me. Yet somehow, in the process of both recovering from my own sense of loss and helping my sister - who … [Read more...]
Missing my writing
Here recently my writing has been on my mind a lot. However, I've been so busy as the new school year has started. I've spent the past couple of month planning out the following school year for my niece/daughter as she is in the 5th grade this year. She is such a bright, smart little girl. She is very young for a 5th grader as she is only 9 and won't turn 10 until the end of October, but you won't know it if you knew how smart she is and how well she handles most of her subjects (history, well … [Read more...]
Reflecting Back on the A to Z Challenge in April
It’s hard to believe that the month of April is already over as well as the A to Z Challenge for 2013. I remember finding out about the challenge toward the end of March and thought it was a pretty kewl idea to take a letter from the alphabet for each day of the month. I knew right from the get go that I’d be doing it about my daughter. However, I had to come up with what each letter for would signify. Here were all the words I used this month: Amazing beautiful caring dare-devil energy … [Read more...]
K is for Kindred Spirit
Because Mari's kindred spirit infiltrated every pore in our bodies. When I think of kindred spirits I always think of the Anne of Green Gables movies. Anne Shirley always talked about how her friends were her bosom friends and that they were kindred spirits. I think Mari was a kindred spirit and that is why she will always be so fondly remembered. For me, she's the one who organically or naturally through no selfish desire showed those around her what love is supposed to look like. So … [Read more...]
I is for independence
As Mari's independence always sprang forth with everything she did. Mari's independence never ceased to amaze those around her. She loved being able to do things on her own like climbing the spiral staircase outside to get to the roof to go dancing on it. Or to find the moment when I wasn't looking to open the window, open the screen, then climb through said window to go dancing in the street. Or flip the tall green laundry hamper upside down so she could climb on top to get to the key that … [Read more...]
A Sad Day
I was walking on my treadmill this morning like I do almost on a daily basis as I try to strengthen my hip. I had been reading a book by Lynette Bonner when my mother-in-law called. She just called to chat. My cell phone sat on the treadmill in front of me. I have the Fox News App on my iPhone. About an hour and ten minutes into talking to Mom and walking I get a news alert stating this: “BREAKING NEWS: Reports of Multiple Fatalities at Conn. Elementary School.” I told mom that there has … [Read more...]
Pursuing true happiness, I mean joy
When I look at those around us and the hustle and bustle that is constantly going on around us, it seems like everyone is in the pursuit of true happiness. Some think their pursuit of money will bring them their desired happiness. Yet, at the end of the day, it never brings anyone happiness. In fact, it only seems to make people more miserable and unhappy as the inanimate object of money can do nothing for them. Some think their pursuit of making and finding new friends will bring them … [Read more...]
What does it mean to nurture?
When God created women, He knew well beforehand that they would become mothers. I have no doubt in my mind He had a long list of what a mother’s qualities and characteristics not only would be but needed to be. Those included loving and show unconditional love, compassionate, friendly, unselfish, kind, patience, teaching their children right and wrong as well as God and how Jesus died on the cross. For obvious reasons, Jesus dying on the cross is number one as we need to do all we can as … [Read more...]
I’m still amazed…
I am still amazed sometimes when someone tells me they think I am a good writer. I have never thought of myself in this light. To be honest, the only time I have written anything before in the past were for 2 reasons and 2 reasons only: an assignment/paper for school/college or writing in my diary. That was it. I never wrote stories or anything. Then Mari gets sick and I write out for all of our friends and family updates on her progress. Then she dies. I purchase a special journal to … [Read more...]
T’was the Night Before Our Lives Changed
T’was the night before our lives changed, forever in our house, No one could have known, not even a mouse. For our hopes hung in the balance with all human care, In the hopes that our prayers would be answered right there. The people who loved her went off to their beds, While they laid there and slept or prayed in their heads. And daddy had his hope, and mommy had her fears, Because the next morning might bring about our tears. We arose the next morning to hear so much clatter, As … [Read more...]
