I think back to the last time I wrote something on here and it was for Mari’s 14th birthday back in December. In only two and a half short months my life permanently changed seven years ago. July will always hold a place in my life of sadness. However, at least I have hope because I know through the life, death and resurrection of Jesus that I will get to see her again one day. I feel blessed that I am a believer because then I know I will get to see her again once I join her in heaven.
Today Keith, my husband of 21 years and the love of my life, loves to go through his Facebook newsfeed and watch different videos people have posted. Some are funny. Some entertaining. Some serious. Some are simply stupid. And then some are one that are just inappropriate.
Today is laundry day for me. I was putting things in the washer when I heard the current video Keith was watching. It was a man who, I guess, is supposed to be a comedian. He was talking about how white people after they’ve lost someone, it’s like they can’t wait to get the body of the person that has died into the ground and basically get on with their lives. Like white people don’t love or care about those they’ve lost. He went on to say that “black folks” basically do care and take at least a week or two before they bury them. Where Keith stopped the video is where the guy was saying that black people don’t just stand around watching a dead body.
While I know I shouldn’t, I took it so personally. Mariana and her lying in her casket came to mind. I can still see her lying there looking like she’s sleeping but the reality slaps you in the face knowing she is gone. Her spirit is gone from her body. She is no longer with us on this earth. That just about much I miss my baby girl. That I’m human and want her back with us so much. That this man had to be the most inconsiderate person to think that talking about “white people’s” losses are a joke and funny. There was nothing funny about losing Mari. I wish that people would learn that somethings just are off-limits to use in a “comedic performance” and inappropriate. Unfortunately, I know there will always be that one who does it anyway, hence this guy.
At least I have my memories of Mariana and know she’s forever apart of me.