Have you ever felt like your life is out of control? You have a direction you'd like to go, but your path is anything but straight. If you'd look back, it's as if you're drunk with the way it looks like you've weaved back and forth along the way. For the last few years, that's how my life has been. There are things happening in our home that began in the summer of 2015. While I can't go into details, the seriousness that's evolved as a result has added an enormous strain on our … [Read more...]
Living Hope
A couple of days ago I shared how I've been internally struggling with a lot of self-loathing and simply not feeling good enough. While the struggle is still ongoing, it's my daily quiet time that helps more than anything else, or for that matter, anyone else, to stay as grounded as possible. Some days I fully outright fail. These are days filled with many tears and the inability to see myself in a positive way. Yet, I guess the positive I need to remember to take away is in those moments where … [Read more...]
Sharing My Struggle
I'm sitting here at my keyboard trying to figure out how to start this very post, yet I can't think of a "fancy" way to do it. So here it goes... I've not shared with very many people the struggles I've been going through for several months now. While I won't go into details, there have been a lot emotionally trying things happening in our home to where I've been really down and my self-loathing is in full swing. I can easily get to a place where I'm beating myself up, saying how stupid I am; … [Read more...]
Do You Have Shiny-Object Syndrome?
Awe... The time-elusive Shiny-Object Syndrome (squirrel)... In other words - PROCRASTINATION! How quickly can we become distracted by something "shiny" that diverts our attention from what we either should or need to be doing? For me, it some times feels, it's all the time. There are things I'm supposed to be doing but don't feel like it. Forcing myself can be so difficult at times. But why is that, especially if I know it's something very important? I just shake my head because I can't give … [Read more...]
Is There Such a Thing as a Perfect Job?
I can remember from the time I was little dreaming of the job I’d want to do when I grew up. My dream to be a nurse started before I was 5 years old. I can remember sitting for an artist who drew one of those silly characters to where you have a little itty bitty body and your head is HUGE. He drew me like this as a nurse. I just knew this is what I wanted to be all through elementary school, junior high, and high school. I applied to colleges based on whether they had a nursing program or … [Read more...]
How Do I Get My Priorities Straight?
I've created something I like to call my "Daily Priorities Notebook". At first, I did it in a 3-subject, 120 sheet, college ruled, spiral bound notebook. The original idea started back in February 2016. The first day I did it was on February 29. I did it everyday until March 10, then missed three days, did it one more time on March 14, and then I stopped for a while. I picked it up again on my birthday last year (August 2, 2016) and only did it until August 9. On August 10 I got a weird … [Read more...]
5 Things to Find Happiness In
You might be thinking that the five things are going to be your stereotypical answers. Yet, the five things might shock you as the word "happy" rarely, if ever, is correlated to these five things: Our Weaknesses Insults Hard Times Suffering Calamities Who in their right might would think these five things can bring any sort of happiness? Certainly not me, at least in the world's view of happiness. However, as a believer, aren't we told to do just this? It says in 2 … [Read more...]
Protected: Have You Ever Felt Lonely?
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Motivation… Or the Lack There of
Motivation. I can be a tricky thing to conquer (especially when all motivation has failed you thus far). You know in your heart you want to do this (whatever it is) and nothing you say or do moves you forward to do it. It's rather irritation quite frankly. For me, I have a couple of things I want to be continuously motivated to do but I'm simply not: Writing and a Personal Quiet Time After Mari died writing became cathartic for me. I had constant ideas floating around my head. However, … [Read more...]
It’s Time to Stand Strong
I haven't felt like doing my personal quiet time for a while now. Ever since I got sick where my stomach felt nauseated for over two months last August. I just have no desire to do it at all anymore. I've prayed about it but the desire is still not there. Well, I decided to spend the last couple of hours literally going through many, many reading plans on bible.com. They have tons to choose from and probably add more to their database all the time. I have now saved over 80 different plans … [Read more...]
